I want to do more than remain sane during these tough times in the United States. Somehow, limping along, squeakily, duct taping rusty parts attached in a haphazard and crooked way has no appeal. Why can’t I shine? Why can’t I make all or at least some of my wildest dreams come true?
Black women have always found ways to make a dolla out of fifteen cents, and our generation can do it too. We can adapt and innovate in the most beautiful ways. But this time it’s different. We are not solely focused on holding up the world around us; we are prioritizing our peace, our pleasure and our health, all at the same time.
We have to think about things differently than we have in the past, because we want something different. Something more fabulous. We need to learn or re-learn how to think outside the (cliche) box. Not only that, we need to carry the box outside the warehouse where the box is stored, past the small town limits, into a whole new world that we create for ourselves. A special place where we revise and even abandon some old mindsets, safely, and on our own terms. We can even name this place. But for now we can just refer to it as Da Spot. Or Xanadu. JK! Or Andromeda. Ok, we’ll get back to this later.
Nothing we do in The Spot is the same ole thing, except for traditional recipes, okay? You have full permission to create your own extraordinary delightful place but in the meantime, you can come hang out in Da Spot. I’ll think of a name for it soon. I thought of calling it Lisa’s World, because that’s what it really is, except no, that sounds corny TO ME. Anyway, this place is safe and judgment-free. This is where you are a goddess and you decide how you want to worship and delight you.
People are gonna tell you that you’re batshit crazy. Let them. Btw, did you know that bat shit is called guano, and it’s a supurb garden soil nutrient? No? Ok. This is inner work we are doing here so there’s no need to share it with anyone else. All outsiders will see is the brilliant changes in your life.
Let’s begin with self care. Toss it aside along with the bubble baths and matcha tea, unless you actually love those things. If you’re not sure, sit and think about it. Do you really like ALL the things that are typically considered self care, or do you pretend to like them because that’s what you were told? Only you know the answer. And, it’s okay if it changes over time because YOU are in charge. I think we should rename self care and just call it Celebration (with a capital C).
Here’s my example: bubble baths are okay. But I would much prefer a frolic in the ocean or a wild foam party, any day. But that’s just me. What about you? Can you name 3 typically self care-ish things and what you would truly prefer instead?
