I caught up with a long time friend I hadn’t spoken to in a long time. It was a nice conversation and what really stood out to me was how she had changed over the years. I have known her for more than 30 years. Back in the day she was very obedient and well mannered.
But something changed and I love it! She was describing to me how life was now, experiencing menopause, and how concurrently she developed this newfound freedom. Now, everybody knows that all throughout my life I’ve never given many fucks, but I did give a few.
She was actually encouraging me to give even fewer! This was so refreshing coming from her. While I’ve never needed any permission, it is a wonderful feeling to get support from friends for living life the way we want to live it. I was explaining to her about my big decision to leave the US for good at the end of 2025 and I told her that I was keeping some of the details of my move a secret until I’m gone. She was wondering why, since I am a grown ass woman and can do whatever I want to do. I didn’t change my mind but I did check in with myself around my reasons and it felt good to do it without any outside pressure.
Now you might be wondering why I’m telling you all this. It fits perfectly in with the overall theme of my life right now and the life of many women of a certain age around me. The ones of us who seem to be the most joyful and happy are the ones who are willing and able to make life decisions based ultimately on our own well being.
Sometimes it can be a challenge to distinguish between not giving a fuck and making grown up decisions without being mean or selfish. For me it’s fairly simple: is the decision based on something that will bring me true contentment, or happiness, or is it based on some external result? That’s not to say that it can’t be a little of both, but because only each individual can truly decide the intended reasons of the decision, we have to just go with our gut.
There is no scientific methodology for making big or life altering choices in life. What is needed is courage. Courage comes from confidence. I have been rehearsing courage for decades and now is where it gets real. I help other women to find that confidence to experience the courage to live their absolute best lives.
How about you? Where are you on the IDGAF spectrum? If you’d like to take it higher, stay tuned.
